The Romance of a Flower (Or, Why Chocolate, Poems, Songs, and Jewels are Better Gifts)

I don’t necessarily agree with everything in this poem, but it was really fun to write :)  I hope you enjoy reading it!


The Romance of a Flower
(Or, Why Chocolate, Poems, Songs, and Jewels are Better Gifts)

The oddest gift of love today
Must be that of a bouquet.

What romance can there be
In a bunch of dying things?
Somehow it’s sweet to say,
“As a sign of my affection,
I’ll destroy a little bit of perfection
So it can wilt on your desk in a day.”

A better sign of love by far
Is a chocolate-filled candy jar.
Give her something delightfully sweet
To get off to a good start,
And should you later break her heart,
She can eat them as she weeps.

If you want to invest some time,
Spend a few hours devising a rhyme.
A poem’s perfect for any sappy comment—
You’ll even get away with comparing her eyes to the ocean;
And nothing shows more devotion
Than losing years of life writing a sonnet.

An even superior substitution
Is a musical composition.
Pour out your feelings in a little tune.
Its notes will linger on
When you are dead and gone.
Why waste money on a fading bloom?

For a real show of security,
Give her something glittery.
A cluster of jewelry doesn’t die.
Should your emotions end,
Diamonds are still a girl’s best friend;
And pearls won’t set her allergies on high.

Of course, all this may be in error—
It’s only, after all, conjecture.
Lacking practical romantic experience,
For all I can say
I might like a bouquet someday,
So don’t give this advice too much credence.

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